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  • Writer's pictureryanmatta

BREECH




What's Funny?

I believe that every single trait and character nuance no matter how slight or how noticeable is a virtue.

I believe in traditional things.

I believe in patience and strength, tolerance and forgiveness all virtues to be sure.

But I also believe that tying your shoes can be a virtue, just as combing your hair or farting silently in an elevator can be virtuous.

I believe that Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr. and the Dali Lama are virtues people, they have all exhibited selfless behavior, and pursued causes that have all been virtuous.

I also believe that my cousin Randy from Methuen Massachusetts is virtues. Randy is virtuous for pouring an entire keg-cup of Miller Lite Beer all over the head of an old man for rooting on the Angles at a Red Sox Home Opener.

He is as virtues as any of the aforementioned social crusaders. The former due to the remarkable achievements in passive civil protest, my cousin Randy was remarkable because it was fucking funny.

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